The Tragic Affair of the Pine Tree Incident
by TheTransfiguredCanary
Summary: Dipper has returned to Gravity Falls yet again. But with the new years comes a tragedy and so Pacifica, Bill, and Mabel must race to save Dipper from a sea of wrongful accusations. Second in the Return to Gravity falls series. Sequel to The Mysterious Case.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Noitisopsnart ranmuloc

Hint: 25341

* * *

A flock of bird, red as the sunset, flew rapidly over the towering pines of Oregon State. After a few meters one bird broke off of the flock and flew down towards a quiet town. The citizens were unfazed by the twittering red song bird above them as it flittered this way and that, dodging power lines and telephone poles before it flew over the last building on its little escapade and re joined the flock. Out of that same building stepped a woman with long blond hair. She was adjusting a light blue scarf to stave off the cold as she smiled at the light dusting of snow all around her. She sighed in contentment before she went towards her destination.

"Morning." The female cop leaning against her cruiser greeted with a gruff voice but gentle smile. The woman smiled and waved.

"Morning, Grenda." She responded. On the woman walked. From the diner window the head waitress with long red hair smiled and waved. The woman waved back. After a while she reached her destination, the party store. She stepped inside with a cheer smile for the aggravated shopkeeper. An hour later she stepped out with a bag full of party hats and noise makers. With that she walked back to the building she had left earlier that morning. As she closed the door behind her a bright yellow blur surrounded all the windows and doors.

"LLAMA FACE! Did you get the stuff?" the inn owner asked appearing with a happy face.

"yep, everything we'll need is right here." she responded, though she looked disgruntled with his nickname for her. He dug into the bag and pulled out the party hats and noise makers and frowned.

"What the… these are made of paper!" he commented with a frown.

"Of course they're made of paper… they're party hats… what else are they made of?" the woman asked in apprehension.

"I thought party hats were made out of tanned kitten flesh."

"WHAT! BILL! TELL ME YOU DIDN'T MURDER KITTENS!"

"I didn't murder kittens?"

"OH GOD!"

"What? Wait… am I not allowed to string up banners of living human flesh either?"

"NO!"

"Why not?"

"BILLLL!"

"Man… I was excited for my first modern human party… now it's starting to sound like it's going to be more boring than the second dimension…"

"Ugh… let me see how you decorated."

"Yeesh you don't trust me?"

"Not anymore."

"Aright fine. So I've got the fairy light made of real fairies, they're chained to the ceiling so they can't move, heh heh. Then there's my grandfather as a clock… it's what I sorta almost remember what my grandfather looked like, watch, I'll just speed up time real quick."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

"AH! BILL!"

"What?"

"Get rid of it!"

"Fine! But what are we supposed to do without a grandfather that works as a clock?" the blond groaned and pulled out her phone.

"This is what a grandfather clock is bill." The woman said showing the owner the picture.

"Oh… woops."

"Also when I said fairy lights I didn't mean literal fairies. It's tiny lights on string like Christmas lights."

"Oh." The owner snapped his fingers. "Like that?"

"Close, but all white… can you make it so they glitter at midnight?"

"Of course! What kind of multi dimensional being would I be if I couldn't?!"

"Bill… did you at least give out the invitations?"

"Relax! I sent invitation to everyone you said and not invitation to everyone else."

"Not… Bill what's a not invitation?"

"It's a piece of paper that says 'don't come to this awesome party that I'm hosting.'"

"BILL!"

"What?! What did I do now?!"

"You're not supposed to send out not invitations!"

"Then how do people know not to come?"

"You don't tell them about it!"

"…oh."

"Ugh Bill!"

"What!"

* * *

Miles away a tall brown haired woman answered her message box.

"Philips! Just hold all my calls! I'm not in the office tonight or for the next few nights for that matter!"

"But-"

"Just tell the corporate offices that I contracted some kind of contagious disease!" she insisted before she released the button and wrapped her hand knitted scarf tightly around her neck.

"Get me out of here Richards." She groaned with a touch of stress. The man in the driver uniform smiled sympathetically and stepped into the elevator with his boss.

* * *

The blond was sitting around waiting excitedly when the first people trickled in. An olive skinned woman was there with her pale husband. He flinched when the owner offered him a drink but the blond calmed him and directed him away from the bar before shooting the owner a dark glance. He had the decency to look sheepish.

"For the last time I didn't know he wasn't being literal!" He muttered. The blond merely rolled her eyes and continued greeting the trickle of guests that were appearing. Soon the party was in full swing but still the blond was glancing around expectantly. "Don't worry llama face, they'll be here." The blond sneered at the name.

"Don't call me that Bill." She insisted at a whisper. The owner rolled his eyes.

"What else can I call you?"

"How about my name?"

"Names are dull." The blond rolled her eyes at that comment and continued her vigil over the door. Hours later she was rewarded.

"You made it!" she cried happily encompassing the somewhat tall brown haired woman wearing the hand knitted scarf in a tight hug.

"Was there ever any doubt, the party doesn't start till I get here. I BROUGHT MULTI LAYERED DIP!" the woman cried. A resounding cheer rose up from the small crowd as the driver walked in with said bowl of dip. The blond laughed even as the brown hair woman looked around.

"Wait… is he not here yet?" the blond winced.

"No… I'm not sure if he'll be here for midnight…" the blond said weakly. The brown haired woman frowned but didn't let her displeasure show as she joined the party. The blond sighed and stared out the window as the snow started falling.

* * *

On route 95 just past McDermitt Oregon a man was caught in traffic. Several cars ahead of him there'd been an accident due to rough weather. The man glanced at his watch and cursed. At this rate he'd miss midnight. He revved his engine in impatience as the minutes ticked away.

* * *

"5!4!3!2!1! HAPPY NEW YEAR!" the crowd cried in jubilation, celebrating another new year. All around the blond couples were kissing to celebrate the New Year. She sighed morosely at the rough weather outside.

"Hey! No frowns!" the brown haired woman said pulling the blond away from the window and to the bar.

"So Ceasar, what's your new year's resolution?" the olive skinned woman asked. The owner stared at her with an excited look.

"Wait? Revolution? You mean I get to burn something? Awesome!" the blond smacked herself in the face.

"No Caesar, not revolution, resolution. It's a goal someone sets for themselves at the start of the year to have completed by the end of the year. Like… err… well what's yours?" the blonds asked the brunette.

"To send a birthday card to every single one of my employees… I set the same goal each year." The woman said with a smile. "I get new employees all the time, so the challenge is keeping up."

"Oh… so it's like a bet?" the owner asked with a raised eyebrow.

"No… it's a personal goal. You're in charge of keeping it… it's a promise you make to yourself." The blond reasoned. The man scoffed.

"That's pointless. You'd never have the will power to achieve the goal if you didn't have something to lose." He said giving the woman a smirk. She just smirked right back.

"Is that so… well then… how bout this Caesar… my goal this year is to solve twice as many cases as I did last year? You set a goal for yourself right now, whoever achieves their goal by the end of the year gets to make the other tell them one embarrassing secret." The blond offered. The owner chuckled darkly, rubbing his hands together.

"You've got yourself a deal. Shake on it?" the owner offered. The blond hesitated before she nodded and took his hands. He cackled evilly after that at which point the blond punched him in the shoulder. "Hey!"

"No maniacal laughter." The blond frowned at him. "So? What's your goal?"

"To better understand humanity." He said off hand. The blond frowned in annoyance.

"You should want to do that anyways!" the owner looked like he was about to respond but was called to the other end of the bar for a drink before he could. As he walked away the blond looked out the window and sighed. The brunette stepped up and frowned.

"He'll be here… just… maybe not just yet…" she reasoned with a sad frown. The blond sighed again and went back to her drink.

* * *

"Bye! Have a great new year!" the olive skinned woman cried as she left with her husband. The bar was empty now. The blond slowly made her way over to a table and stared sadly down at a small notebook in her hands. The brunette was at the bar with the owner. She looked angry.

"Oh when I get my hands on him." she growled out angrily. The owner was frowning.

"I'm telling you, something held him up. He looked pained to leave last time I think he'd be scratching to come back."

"The term is itching bill."

"Right anyways" the owner was cut off by a banging on the door. "WE'RE CLOSED!" he shouted with a twitch of annoyance. "Can't humans read?"

"BILL, OPEN THE DOOR!" cried out a familiar gruff voice. The blond leapt off her seat and threw open the door. She stood there for a few second smiling at the tall man covered in snow. After a few seconds she threw herself at him with a wide smile!

"You made it!" she cried as the man chuckled as he stepped in. the owner snapped his fingers and once again the door was locked and closed.

"Glad you could make it…"

 _"Pine Tree"_

* * *

YEAF HNAVA PWGTL PYRYS AERIL


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Riafyalp

* * *

"Pacifica." Dipper murmured with a slight smile. Pacifica smiled up at him before pulling him over to the bar. "Bill."

"Pine Tree." The demon responded with a flippant tone.

"Nice place." Dipper commented. Mabel and Pacifica were looking between the two worried.

"Thanks. And thanks for the freedom to make it." Bill commented. Dipper nodded.

"You're welcome." He responded. Bill smirked at that.

"So Pines pick your poison!" Bill cried. Pacifica frowned.

"Bill…" she said warningly

"What?" Bill cried holding his hands up. Dipper and Mabel frowned.

"What? What did he do?" Dipper asked. Bill glared at him.

"Oh you automatically accuse me of doing something bad! Nice to see nothing's changed Pine Tree!" he snarled angrily at the tall man.

"You almost killed Robbie Bill! That IS something bad!" Pacifica cried with a groan. Dipper and Mabel stared at her in horror before Dipper glared at Bill.

"What did you do?" he asked angrily. Bill was glaring at Pacifica before he looked at Dipper and rolled his eyes.

"It was an accident! Bleeding Heart responded with arsenic! How was I supposed to know it'd kill him! You humans are so fragile!" Bill commented with a huff. Both Dipper and Mabel smacked themselves in the forehead and groaned. "What?"

"I'm not even surprised actually…" Dipper commented with a bit of deadpan. Pacifica nodded with a heavy sigh.

"Oh come on… it's not that bad." Bill said with a slight chuckle. Mabel, Dipper and Pacifica all shot him a look that he recoiled from slightly. "I apologized!" Dipper just shook his head.

"Well… it's pretty late." Pacifica commented glancing at the clock. Bill smirked.

"Want a few hours back? I can make it midnight again." Bill offered. Pacifica smiled but shook her head.

"No… I'm fine with how it all played out." Pacifica said before she threw a smile in Dipper direction and made for the stairs.

"Night, Dipper." Mabel said before she too went upstairs. Dipper looked at Bill.

"So… an inn?" Dipper asked as Bill poured himself and Dipper a whiskey on the rocks. Bill chuckled.

"I was inspired." He said before he gave the drink to Dipper and they clinked glasses.

"It's nice… do you ever play?"

"Every night…"

"Hmm."

"What have you been up to? What took you so long?"

"I was stuck in traffic; there was a big accident on the 95."

"Heh heh. Avoiding the question huh? Well I'm alright with that. Pacifica will get it out of you eventually."

"I don't know what you're talking about Bill." Dipper said before he sipped his drink again. Bill snorted.

"Fine by me… room 1." Bill said with a smirk handing Dipper the key. Dipper nodded before he drained his drink. Up he climbed the stairs and opened the door to room one. Pacifica glanced up from her book as he stood in the door for a few seconds.

"BIIILLLLL!" Dipper shouted angrily. Downstairs the demon fell to the floor clutching his stomach in laughter.

* * *

"Morning." Mabel yawned as she came down the stairs. Dipper and Pacifica were waiting for her.

"Come on then, Wendy is reserving a table for us." Pacifica said. With that the trio left the bar, Bill waving them off with a smirk. As they walked through the town Dipper smiled at the townsfolk as they waved to him. Pacific also received several waves and hellos. Mabel waved happily to Grenda as she drove by in her cruiser.

"I miss this place every time I go." Mabel commented with a sigh. Dipper sighed as they entered the dinner. They sat down as Wendy came over.

"Hey!" she cried happily encompassing Mabel and dipper in a hug. With that the four of them sat down at the table. Wendy waved for her black haired protégé. "Rosetta! Four coffees, a plate of toast and a pie!" Wendy called. The tall teen rolled her eyes and snapped her gum but went to fill the order. "So, what have you two been up to these last four months?"

"Meetings, charity events, store openings. Boring stuff, Dipper probably had all the exciting things happen to him." Mabel commented. With that the three women turned to Dipper with smiles. Dipper thought back to what he had done over the Christmas holidays.

* * *

Gun fire in a parking lot. Dipper was hiding behind a midsize with a bullet in his shoulder. He was reloading his last clip into his gun.

"Damn." He grumbled before looked over the car and fired at the gang members on the other end of the parking lot.

* * *

"Paperwork." Dipper responded. The trio looked disappointed but Dipper didn't want to have to deal with the fallout of what had really happened. Besides… he had done paperwork…

* * *

Dipper's arm was in a sling as he signed paper after paper after paper explaining why he had fired his gun. The very unimpressed secretary was glaring at him from over her glasses. Dipper groaned as another stack of paper was placed next to him by another secretary. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

"Lots of paperwork." Dipper repeated with a tired tone. Pacifica gave him a sympathetic look.

"Well I did lots of paperwork too." She commented. Dipper and Mabel glanced at her in confusion as Rosetta came over with their order. "I started a mystery solving business in Gravity Falls." The pair stared at her before Dipper burst into laughter. Mabel shot him a dirty look but it went away when Dipper looked at Pacifica with a bright smile.

"So you're never not working huh?"Dipper asked. Pacifica laughed.

"No… there's always a mystery in Gravity Falls." She said with a smile. The pair smiled at one another for a few seconds as Mabel and Wendy exchanged a look and their own knowing smile. Pacifica broke the connection first and pulled out a day planner. "Actually… I have a case right now… the mayor… he called me a few days ago…" Pacifica said looking up at Dipper with a smile. "Would you like to help?"

"Certainly." Dipper said with a smile. So the pair stood and went on their merry way. Wendy and Mabel sat at the table for a few seconds before Wendy looked at Mabel.

"Did I see what think I saw?" Wendy asked.

"Yes, you did." Mabel confirmed with a smile

"Wow… I almost feel bad…" Wendy said with a chuckle. Mabel snorted.

"You two would never work."

"Don't need you to tell me that." Wendy commented before she left Mabel to her half eaten slice of pie. Mabel sighed before she scarfed it down and left money on the table. She went out into town to get some lunch for later. As she left the grocery store suddenly the bag was ripped out of her hand.

"SHMEBULOCK!"

"Oh come on! Get back here you little pest!" Mabel cried out as she chased after the gnome.

"SHMEBULOCK!"

* * *

"And so you see… it's not so much a mystery as a request." The mayor said to the pair. Pacifica and Dipper looked into the well.

"How far does it go?" Pacifica asked in slight uncertainty.

"I have no idea." The mayor said looking into it himself. Dipper dropped a small stone into it. The trio waited. And waited. And waited. Finally they heard a distant splash. Dipper and Pacifica looked at each other in slight horror. Dipper turned to Tyler Cutebiker

"What did you say you wanted from there?"

"A medal. It belonged to my father… I dropped it in there by accident a few days ago… could you get it back? It there anyway?" he asked hopefully. Dipper looked at the well before he smiled.

"Yes actually. I know exactly how we can get it back." Dipper assured. Pacifica raised an eyebrow at him but didn't comment. The mayor was very thankful, shaking both their hands happily before he left to get to work. Pacifica looked at dipper with a raised eyebrow.

"So… how are we going to get that back? The well is almost a hundred feet deep." Pacifica asked. Dipper turned to her with a smirk.

"Tell me Pacifica, do you believe in aliens?" Dipper asked. Pacifica just looked at him in confusion.

* * *

"SHMEBULOCK!" the small gnome cried before it skittered through one clearing and back into the bush. Mabel panted as she stepped into the clearing then slowed to a halt as she panted.

"Fine… you win… keep the sandwich." Mabel gasped out. After a few seconds she straightens up and looked around. The snow dusted forest looked the same in all directions. "Dang it." Mabel muttered in annoyance. Getting lost in Gravity Falls was never a good thing. Suddenly there was a flash of red in the woods. Mabel flinched and looked around eyeing a very handy branch. She picked it up, gripping it like a base ball bat. She slowly crept towards the red figure that was standing before a tall pine tree. After a few seconds she jumped out and swung.

"OW!" a deep male voice cried. "What was that for?!" the man asked her in annoyance. Mabel dropped her branch in horror.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry! I thought you were a windego!" she said apologetically

"A… a what?" the red headed man asked in confusion.

"It's a goat monster that eats people… at least that's what Dipper said." Mabel said. The man blinked.

"Oh… hey… you're Mabel Pines aren't you?" he asked with a slight smile. Mabel blinked.

"Erm… yeah… who are you?" she asked.

"Oakley. I'm Wendy's younger brother." Oakley said with a smile. Mabel blinked.

"You got taller." She commented. He laughed loudly.

"Yeah, seemed like one day I went to bed shorter than Wendy and woke up as tall as dad." Oakley said with a smile. Then he frowned. "What are you doing out here always?"

"A gnome stole my lunch." Mabel said.

"Shmebulock?"

"Yeah." The pair looked at one another for a few seconds before they both started laughing. After a few minutes Oakley pulled out a cooler.

"Here, have half my sandwich." He offered. Mabel took it and looked at him with a smile.

"Thanks… Erm… can you point me in the direction of the Mystery Shack?" Oakley frowned.

"It's right there." He said pointing to behind Mabel. Mabel turned around and just as Oakley said the shack was right behind her. Mabel stared at it in shock for a few seconds before she shook her head and turned back to Oakley.

"Do you want to come in for your lunch?" she offered. Oakley smiled.

"Sure… thanks."

"It's no problem… it's the least I could do… I wacked you in the head with a branch… do you want some ice for that?"

"Naw. I've got a head like a coconut." Oakley commented knocking on his head for emphasis. Mabel snorted even as she and Oakley entered the mystery shack where Soos welcomed them happily

* * *

"This is… this is… it this real?!" Pacifica asked as she looked around in shock. Dipper chuckled a bit.

"Now I know how Ford felt." He said before looked around with a frown. "Huh… it seemed bigger before."

"You've been here before?" she asked in confusion.

"Oh yes. We have to be careful. The security system is still active in some part of the ship." Dipper warned before he led Pacifica into the ship. He looked around before he frowned. "Where did they go?" Pacifica looked through another pile of debris.

"What are we looking for exactly?" she asked. Picking up strange disks that had been tossed aside.

"It's a magnetic gun." Dipper said shoving a fallen panel off to the side. "I thought I saw a few hanging on the wall this way when Ford brought me down here…"

"Does it look like this?" Pacifica asked holding one up. Dipper looked up at her then his face fell.

"Pacifica… don't move." He said quietly. Pacifica froze. "Don't look behind you… just stay perfectly still and breathe." Dipper slowly took a step forward then froze himself. The pair completely still when suddenly Dipper rushed forwards and pushed Pacifica aside. The seed shaped object fired some sort of laser at Dipper and he was blasted backwards with a groan. Pacifica fired the magnet gun and the creature crackled with electricity before it exploded. Pacifica raised her arm to protect herself from the debris before she rushed over to dipper. He was groggily rising to his feet.

"Come on, we have to get out of here." He murmured but he stumbled and so Pacifica took his arm over his shoulder and together the pair rushed out of the spaceship. With a bang Pacifica slammed the hatch closed even as Dipper slumped to the ground. He groaned before he slowly removed his coat and sweater. There was a hole burnt through both and the tee shirt underneath revealed charred skin. Pacifica stared at it helplessly before she glared at Dipper.

"Why did you do such a stupid thing!" she shouted even as she took her water bottle and poured water over his ruined sweater before holding it over the burn. Dipper hissed in pain but made no other noise. "You could have been killed you idiot!" Pacifica continued as she helped Dipper to his feet. Dipper stopped her and steadied himself.

"I would do it all over again if I had to." He murmured. Pacifica frowned at him angrily.

"Don't risk your life for me! I can take care of myself!"

"I have no doubt." Dipper said with a chuckle. "But I want to keep you safe, because I care for you." Pacifica blinked at that.

"What are you… what are you saying?"

* * *

"…and then we broke through the dam and there where beavers all over us! They ate the boat and my hair and Soos' shirt. And he had no control…"

"Oh hey yeah! I remember that day! You drove through our boat and all these fish started jumping up. Dad said it was the fish coming for revenge and told us to swim for our lives!" Oakley and Mabel laughed away after that. After a few seconds Mabel's smile grew sad.

"I miss him… and… well… we didn't get to know them long enough…" Mabel said even as tears welled up in her eyes. Oakley sighed sadly.

"I know how you feel… mom died when I was just a kid…" Oakley said sadly. Mabel looked at him sadly.

"I'm sorry." Mabel said. Oakley just smiled.

"Hey… it's not your fault. We knew them as long as we had to. As long as we can tell their stories they're still here." Oakley said. Mabel smiled wide at that.

"Thank you." She said quietly. Oakley just smiled back. "Tell me a story about your mom." Oakley laughed.

"Okay… so my mom was a big flower buff. Well one day my dad crushed all my mom's flowers with a tree…"

* * *

"Pacifica… will you marry me?" Dipper asked. Pacifica stared at him in shock. She took in his hopeful face, his tired stance, the awful burn on his shoulder and smiled.

"YES!" she cried giving a hug.

"OW! Ow okay mind the shoulder." Dipper cried out holding the damp sweater to his burn again. Pacifica winced before leaned up and kissed him.

* * *

Miles away Bill glanced up. He'd felt a shiver crawl up his spine.

"What was that?" he asked in confusion. As he said that the door opened. Mabel walked in with Oakley

"… and then Grunkle Stan rolled a perfect 36 and we saved them! It was amazing! I still don't know how he did it though… it looked like it was about to change but then it didn't… either way we played one other game after that… but then Grunkle Ford accused Grunkle Stan of cheating and they got into a huge argument… again… they fought a lot." Mabel commented with a heavy sigh. Oakley chuckled a bit.

"Siblings argue. It's just the way things are. Wendy and my brothers and fight all the time. Usually over really dumb things. Like who borrowed who's car and whoever Birchlin is dating this week." Oakley said. Bill was trying to focus but all the chatter was making it hard.

"Stop talking." Bill cried as he looked out into nothing. Mabel scoffed at him with a glare. After a few seconds Bill's eyes widened and he gaped at her. "Pine Tree and Llama Face are getting married." He said in shock. Mabel's glare melted away into a huge smile.

"REALLY!?" Mabel asked with a squeal. Bill held his ears.

"Ow. Geez how high can your voice go?" he asked. Oakley was laughing.

"Well… I better say congratulations when I see him." as he said that the door burst open.

"Bill! I need cold water, rubbing alcohol, and a bandage!" Pacifica cried as she helped Dipper walk in. Mabel gasped when she saw the burn on Dipper's shoulder.

"What did you do?!" she asked even as Pacifica applied more water to the burn before she put some rubbing alcohol on Dipper slammed his fist on the table.

"Hot Belgian waffles that hurts!" he shouted even as Pacifica continued cleaning it. After a few seconds she ripped open his tee shirt and wrapped his shoulder with a bandage. He leaned back into the bar and groaned. Pacifica lifted up his coat and inspected the singed hole in shoulder then she frowned.

"Dipper… why is there a bullet hole in your right shoulder." She asked evenly. Mabel and Pacifica both turned to him with angry expectant look. Dipper groaned and let his head fall to the bar. Bill cackled.

"Just think Pine Tree, you're gonna be living this."

* * *

ITOS PAR DFOO AADMTDQA KMT SIDKW BAEIOMH


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Rehpic trofuaeB

* * *

Mabel did her hair up and inspected it in the mirror. Dipper frowned from behind her.

"What are you doing?" he asked in confusion as Mabel applied mascara, trying to ignore him fluttering behind her.

"I'm getting ready." She commented when it appeared he wouldn't leave. Dipper frowned.

"For what?" he asked.

"I'm going on a date with Oakley." Mabel said. Dipper blinked.

"Oh… well… have fun I guess…" Dipper said. Mabel smiled before she left. Dipper turned to the bar where Pacifica was planning her next round of cases. "I have to admit… I find it a bit surreal…"

"What?"

"Well… all of it… a year ago I would be in some far flung city in America investigating who knows what for some hopeless relative… now I'm back in Gravity Falls… and it almost feels like nothing's changed…"

"That's because nothing ever happens here." Bill commented with a bored look. Pacifica rolled her eyes.

"Actually Bill, I think you'll find that a lot happens around here, but you don't want anything to do with anyone so you don't notice." Pacifica murmured. Bill frowned.

"That's not true… I hang out with you don't I?"Bill commented. Pacifica groaned.

"That's exactly what I mean Bill; you need to get out more. You wouldn't have all these questions about humanity if you actually talked with somebody." Pacifica argued. Bill scoffed.

"Everyone else is boring." Bill said. Pacifica frowned.

"Complimenting me won't make me forget what we were talking about Bill." Pacifica said. Bill made a face like he hadn't expected her to figure that fact out. Dipper laughed. Suddenly the door burst opened. Into the bar stepped Grenda and two FBI agents.

"Dipper Pines! You're under arrest for the murder of Preston Northwest!" one of the agents yelled.

"WHAT!" the three at the bar cried in confusion. The agents stepped forwards and grabbed Dipper and hauled him off the seat.

"Hey! Hey! What do you mean murder!" Dipper cried even as he was handcuffed and dragged away. Grenda left a lingering apologetic look on Pacifica as she closed the door again. Pacifica just stood there in shock.

* * *

"I know it was you Pines. We have solid proof." The tall FBI agent cried. Dipper stared at him in confusion.

"I didn't even know he was dead! How could I have killed him?" Dipper asked in confusion. The FBI agent growled before he pulled him over a TV.

"These are the Northwest mansion security camera's." the man said as he inserted a tape into the video player. Time stamped at 7:45 pm Dipper was seen walking through the front gate of Northwest Manor with a grim face. Ten minutes later Dipper was seen leaving the manor his face set into a harsh frown. The man paused the tape and placed his hands wide apart on the tale across from him. "Preston was found dead ten minutes after you left Pines. You can't worm your way out of this one." Dipper suddenly had a snap of recognition.

"Parkson? Donald Parkson? What are you doing here?" Dipper asked with a harsh frown.

"I should hardly think it matters. You're the one who's going to prison… oh wait… I forgot." Donald stood in the door way for a few seconds and threw an evil look Dipper's way. "Oregon has the death penalty." With that the door slammed in Dipper's horrified face.

* * *

Pacifica stood before the Northwest gates in slight trepidation. With a shaky hand she pushed the button for the intercom.

"Yes, who is it?" Pricilla asked shakily

"Pacifica." The blond responded with a waiver in her voice.

"What do you want?" the elderly woman asked harshly.

"To know if my father is really dead." Pacifica murmured quietly. The gate buzzed and Pacifica entered the place she had only months ago considered home. Just inside in the main parlor Pricilla was waiting with a stretched face. Pacifica stared up at her mother and waited.

"Yes… he is… I found him in his study… after your fiancé left." Pricilla said with a quiet tone. Pacifica blinked in shock.

"You know?"

"Yes… Pines came to ask if Preston and I would be coming to your wedding… Preston said no… Pines stormed out after that. I went in a few minutes later and found him dead on the desk." Pricilla said with a horror to her voice. Pacifica frowned as she heard that.

"May… May I see his office?" Pacifica asked. Pricilla frowned.

"The investigators already combed through it…" Pricilla said with an untrusting glare. Pacifica held strong.

"I'd like to conduct my own investigation." Pacifica said. After a few seconds Pricilla relented and led Pacifica to her father's office. Pacifica stepped in and felt like a teenager again, thinking to all the times her father had called her into his office to scold her. Pacifica shook her head and looked around. Everything was meticulously organized, just as she remembered. Then Pacifica frowned. There was a bottle missing from the liquor cabinet. Pacifica looked around before she looked into the waste basket. There was a broken bottle. Pacifica pulled out a note pad and wrote that down. She looked around the desk before she found a few bottles of pills. She wrote the names down quickly before he flipped through the appointment book on the desk. Apparently Dipper had arranged an appointment with him ahead of time. Pacifica frowned. Why hadn't Dipper told her he was going to see him? Pacifica sighed then she noticed something. Near the end of the notebook was the note Preston had written to himself. 'Send gift. D+P P.' Pacifica choked back a slight sob. That note was written for the date that Pacifica and Dipper had agreed to get married on. Preston may have refused to come but perhaps he had still cared. Pacifica rubbed away a tear even as she closed her notepad and exited the office. She made her own way out of the mansion but told herself she would send a wedding invitation to Pricilla, even if she didn't attend.

* * *

Dipper was pacing in his holding cell when Grenda walked in.

"You have a visitor." She said with an apologetic voice. She escorted to the visiting room. Before they entered she faced him. "Just so you know… don't think you killed him… or anyone for that matter…" Dipper didn't respond as the pair entered the room. Mabel was sitting at the table. Dipper sat across from her.

"What is going on? Bill came and told me Northwest is dead and you're in jail. What happened?"

"Mabel… I need you to get me a lawyer."

".. Dipper… please, just tell me what's going on."

"An old colleague is trying to get me on Death Row."

"WHAT?!" Mabel cried in panic. Dipper quieted her.

"Please, just call your best lawyer and get them over here." Dipper said worriedly. Mabel opened her mouth to respond when the door banged open. Agent Parkson was standing in the door way and he was very angry.

"I didn't say he could have visitors!" he snarled at Grenda. Mabel threw him a dirty look even as Grenda came in led him away.

"Pacifica is investigating! We'll get you out of this Dipper!" Mabel cried as Dipper was led away back to his cell.

* * *

Pacifica sighed as she leaned into the bar top. Bill was revising her notes, trying to find some piece of proof that would free Dipper.

"Ugh… why can't I just go back in time and see if he really did kill Northwest or not?" Bill asked in annoyance tossing the notes back onto the pile. Pacifica groaned.

"Because that won't hold up in a court Bill. It's impossible to go back in time remember." Pacifica grumbled. Being able to go back in time would solve a lot.

"No it's not." Bill commented in confusion.

"It is for normal people." Pacifica clarified

"Oh yeah." Bill said with a frown. As they were sitting there Mabel walked in with a tall man in a black suit with a red tie. He smiled at the pair and held out his hand.

"Hi there, names Augustus Riegnfield. I understand your investigating this case as well?"

"Yes…" Pacifica said warily eyeing him. Mabel sighed.

"Augustus is one of my lawyers." She said sadly. Pacifica's eyes widened.

"Wait! You mean he's already being charged?! But I'm not finished my investigation! I registered with the town and everything! They can't move forward until I'm finished!" Pacifica cried in horror. Augustus sighed.

"Donald Parkson is a very powerful FBI agent. He has quite a bit of influence. I have a feeling he's going to try and have you discredited. He might even go as far as having your investigation license revoked."Augustus said with a bitter tone. Pacifica stared at her hands in dread.

"So there's nothing I can do?" she asked in fear.

"Well… I have some good news and I have some bad news." Augustus said with a business like tone. "The good news is I can protect you from Donald for quite a while… the bad news… this isn't the first time Dipper has been accused of murder." The trio stared at him in horror.

"What?" Mabel asked in shock. Augustus pulled out a case file.

"He was never charged. Her name was Elizabeth Michaels. According to Parkson, Dipper shoved her into the line of fire during a fire fight in Chicago." Augustus said gravely. Pacifica frowned.

"Parkson was the one to accuse him?"

"He was there during the fire fight. According to him he watched Dipper physically hold her in front of him as a shield. The courts wouldn't accept his testimony because they said he was a trauma victim. Apparently he never forgave them for letting Dipper get away with murder."

"No… there's no way…" Mabel murmured in horror. Pacifica was staring at Augustus feeling sick to her stomach. Bill was simply thoughtful as he watched the lawyer with a frown. After a few seconds Pacifica spoke.

"Why did Parkson press charges?"

"Elizabeth was his sister." Augustus said. Pacifica let out a breath of air in defeat.

" **But what if he's really innocent**?" Mabel asked. The trio stared at her. She looked back at them with determination. "It's our duty to him to try as hard as we can to get him out of prison, maybe we can't, but we have to try!"

"There's something you should know Mabel…" Augustus said worriedly, not wanting to cause her any more stress.

"What?" Mabel asked uncertainly. Augustus swallowed heavily.

"Dipper is being charged with aggravated murder." He murmured. Pacifica paled drastically and slumped in her seat slightly. Bill steadied her and looked at the lawyer angrily.

"What! What does that mean?" he asked accusingly. Mabel was glaring at him too. Pacifica whimpered. The pair turned to her. She had tears in her eyes.

"The death penalty." She whispered. It was Mabel's turn to faint. Her eyes rolled into her head and Augustus rushed to catch her.

* * *

TC APZI ABB DRP MQJ IDJTJW ZURJB?


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

trats pot 3 ecnefliar

* * *

"Hasbian Determined here with the latest report of the Northwest murder investigation. Police have finally released a statement pertaining to the late Preston Northwest's murder including injuries previously unmentioned. It appears as though Preston was brutally assaulted before being strangled to death according to the autopsy. The prime suspect is in fact local legend and town hero Dipper Pines. he was seen entering the Northwest mansion just minutes before Northwest was killed and leaving just minutes before Northwest's body was discovered. FBI Agent Donald Parkson is in charge of the investigation and would like to assure the public that if Dipper Pines is in fact the killer he will be put away. Back to you Susan."

* * *

Mabel was pacing across the floor while Bill re filled her drink. She ignored it and continued pacing. After a few minutes Pacifica walked in. Mabel rushed over to her.

"Well?!" she begged. Pacifica sighed sadly.

"Everybody else had an alibi." She murmured in defeat. Mabel looked horrified. She slumped into a nearby table and sobbed heavily as she thought about losing the only thing she had left. Pacifica sat across from her defeat and thought about losing Dipper before he could even be called hers. As they were sitting there was a knock on the door. Bill grumbled about humans not being able to read and threw the door open. Oakley was standing in the door. Bill grumbled something unintelligible.

"MABEL YOUR BOYFRIEND IS HERE!" he shouted. Mabel looked up, blushing beet red, and flung a glare in Bill's general direction. She walked up to Oakley.

"I'm sorry." She sniffled. "I know I cancelled four times in a row now… I just." Mabel didn't finish as Oakley gave her a tight hug. Mabel's eye filled with tears before she held unto him and sobbed into his plaid shirt. Pacifica watched them standing in the doorway and began sobbing into her hands. After a few seconds she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey… llama face… look at me." Bill said quietly. Pacifica looked up at him. "Whatever happens… you have to move through it… don't… don't end up like me… all bitter and messed up." Pacifica sniffed.

"You're not messed up Bill." She said good naturedly. Bill smirked.

"Tell that you your great great great aunts." He said moving back over to the bar. Pacifica chuckled a bit darkly at that. After a few minutes of sobbing Oakley led Mabel out of the bar, talking about ice cream and Wendy's diner. Mabel looked at Pacifica who nodded and waved her off. Mabel gave her a thankful look. As Pacifica sat around she fruitlessly flipped through her case notepad again. As she was reading her notes. She suddenly stood.

"Oh my god!" She cried as a smile suddenly bloomed over her face. Bill looked up from the photo he was looking at.

"Huh? What's going on?" he asked. Pacifica didn't respond as she dashed out of the door. Bill threw up his arms in annoyance.

"How is it that I can control all of time, space, and matter, but I'm always the last person to find everything out!" he shouted angrily before he frowned at the door and reasoned he'd wait for Pacifica to come back and explain everything to him. As he sat there he glanced down. Behind the bar he always kept a photo. It was a bit cheesy really. But it was a picture of Dipper, Pacifica, and Mabel all smiling after they had solved the case of Pacifica the first disappearance. Bill grumbled and seriously hoped this wouldn't end like it did for the first Pines idiots. Bill snorted. Sorry, he meant twins.

* * *

Dipper was sitting in his holding cell wondering if he'd ever see Pacifica again when the door opened and the object of his thoughts rushed in with a wide smile and happy tears. Dipper was a bit shocked as Pacifica clung to him, sobbing happily into his shoulder. Grenda was standing in the door smiling. Dipper looked at her in confusion.

"You're free to go." She said gruffly. Dipper stared at her with even wider eyes when as Pacifica smiled up at him.

"But what about Parkson?" as if on cue the obviously unhinged FBI agent appeared looking almost murderous.

"He can't leave! We have proof! He killed Northwest! I know he did!"

"no he didn't! Pull yourself together!" Grenda cried even as Donald pointed at Pacifica accusingly.

"Her investigation was denied by the courts! She expresses a conflict of interest as the accused fiancé and the victim's daughter! Her investigators license was revoked! None of her findings are valid!" Donald cried. Grenda nodded.

"Yes that's right." Grenda said. Donald turned to her in confusion. "She asked us to go over our findings again and we discovered some new evidence. We sent it to the head office and the results came back this morning. Dipper is not a murderer. The bruises Northwest had on his face were from falling in his drunk stupor. The ones around his neck happened when his tie got stuck in the liquor cabinet. That's how he dropped the bottle and broke it. Tox screen just came back. Dipper is not a murderer." Grenda said strongly. Donald visibly snapped.

"YES HE IS! HE MURDERED MY SISTER! HE USED HER A SHIELD!" Donald screamed.

"NO I DIDN'T!" Dipper shouted. "Elizabeth took those bullets for me! She stepped in front of me even though I told her not to! I didn't hold her there! I didn't force her!" Dipper insisted firmly. Donald ran at him but Dipper punched him in the face and knocked him to the ground. Grenda dove on him and handcuffed the obviously deranged man even as he was screaming to be let go. She roughly shoved him out of the holding cell. Dipper turned to Pacifica in confusion. "What new evidence came forwards?" Pacifica shook her head.

"I think he should get back to Bill first… I kinda left without telling him anything." Pacifica said with a slight grimace. Dipper snorted.

"Oh I'm sure he didn't like that." Dipper said. Pacifica laughed weakly. She looked at him with a wide grin before she shook her head and clutched his face before landing a hard kiss on his lips. After a few seconds she hugged him and she leaned her head on his shoulder. Dipper sighed.

"I'm just so glad your okay." She murmured quietly. The pair stood there for a few minutes as they settled in their mutual relief.

* * *

Oakley and Mabel were sitting at the bar quietly sharing a drink. Bill was grumpily standing at the other end of the pair staring at the pair as they chattered about this and that. Suddenly the door opened and in stepped.

"DIPPER!" Mabel cried happily almost bowling him over in a tight hug. The tall man laughed as Mabel squeezed him as tight as she could.

"Okay, okay, I'm alright!" he cried as Mabel began sobbing into his shoulder. She looked him up and down before she nodded and stepped back. Bill stepped forwards.

"Hey pine tree." He began quietly. "Do that again and you'll never have a nightmare-less sleep again okay?" he said. He didn't wait for a reply before he continued. "So, what happened? Who killed Northwest?"

"Yeah? How did you get Dipper free?" Mabel asked Pacifica. The blond's face fell a bit and she sat at the bar. Mabel settled between her and Oakley and Dipper sat on her other side taking her hand. She grinned at him thankfully as Bill leaned on the bar in front of her.

"My father killed himself." She said sadly. The others in the room gasped, raised eyebrows, and stared in confusion. "After you came my father was… I don't really know what he was feeling… but he decided he wanted a drink… it was an accident… he had a bottle of whiskey… he must have drunk the whole thing… I found the broken bottle in the trash… he was drunk… when his wrist timer went off for his medication he over dosed on it." Pacifica finished with a heavy sigh and few tears. Dipper looked at her sadly before he pulled her head onto his shoulder. Bill stared at them before he snorted.

"What is it with Northwest's and tragic accidental deaths?" He muttered bitterly. Dipper looked at him. After a few seconds Bill glared angrily at the space around him and disappeared in a white flash. Oakley gasped in shock. Dipper, Pacifica, and Mabel looked at him as he pointed at the spot that Bill had been in fear.

"He! And then! What! What is going on?!" Oakley cried in fear, clutching at his own head. Mabel groaned.

"This is the part where my perfect romance crumbles into nothing… again…" she murmured sadly. Oakley just stared at her in confusion. "That was Bill Cipher." She admitted. Oakley face fell into horror and he looked around at the bar then back to the spot where Bill had been.

"My god." He finally said with a pale face. Mabel waited hopelessly for him to get up and leave. "He's… actually kind of alright…" Oakley admitted in horror. Mabel was now staring at him with a wide open mouth and eyes. After a few seconds she smiled and planted a kiss on his lips.

"You are the best guy I've ever met!" she cried giving him a hug. Oakley was in slight shock but hugged her back. Dipper and Pacifica laughed as Mabel kept on hugging Oakley.

* * *

Bill reappeared with a flash. He was in his demon form again floating soundlessly as he stared at his portrait of Pacifica that had never been.

"You're back then?" Dipper asked from behind him. Bill turned to him and frowned.

"I'm not sure." He said quietly. Dipper smiled.

"Sometimes Bill… moving on isn't a set thing… it takes time… you… you have to keep trying… or find something to live for." Dipper said with a slight smile. Bill frowned and looked back at the portrait.

"What do I have to live for?" Bill asked. Dipper tossed the picture at him. Bill caught it and stared.

"You have us Bill…" Dipper insisted. "You're already part of the family I think." Bill frowned.

"What?"

"well just think… Mabel and I would never have come to gravity falls without you." Bill blinked, now very confused.

"Huh?"

"If Ford would never have summoned you. He would never have built the portal; he would never have discovered the truth. He would never have called Stan. Stan would never have come here. Ford would never have gone through the portal… I have you to thank for meeting Grunkle Stan and Ford Bill…" Dipper explained with a touch of nostalgia. Bill was shocked.

"You called them Grunkle." He said. Dipper smiled a bit and made his way up the stairs.

"Goodnight Bill." He said before he disappeared into room 1. Bill simply floated there as he stared at the photo. After a while he took a few steps towards the bar and with a smile placed the picture where it could easily be seen behind the bar. He stared at it for a few seconds before he began cleaning up for the next day.

* * *

ASHYRN.

N*OTEMSEYED..

D**T*S*


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Edoc esrom

* * *

All around chatter filled the air. Many people were laughing and smiling, milling around tall wooden structures. Suddenly a light ring cut through the buzzing.

"Alright! Time for my speech!" called out the tall blond man. He looked over at the happy couple and smirked.

"Apparently I'm allowed to be embarrassing as I want! This should be fun! Now Pine Tree… oh Pine Tree I remember when I first met you! You were so sweaty and awkward I figured you'd never get a girlfriend… now you married… how is it that I'm still single?"

"You don't get out enough Caesar!" the bride cried in annoyance. The crowd laughed. The blond glared at them all

"Who's supposed to be embarrassing who lla… Pacifica? Right! Me! So shush! Anyways, you and Mabel were so cute back then. All those times you were running around getting in trouble. I bet you gave your Grunkles heart attacks everyday… I'm sure if they could be here they'd have stories to tell." In explicably he caught a tall brunettes eyes amid the crowd and blinked. The crowd frowned in confusion. Bill blinked a few times before he cleared his throat. "Anyways, that's beside the point. While I might find it a bit unfair Dipper, that you're getting married before I am, I wish a very happy and long marriage!" there was applause after that. And the crowd continued their muttering. Bill made his way over to his seat. Dipper leaned over and muttered in his ear.

"What was that all about?" he asked. Bill smirked.

"Just something about your wedding present." Bill said before he blinked. Dipper frowned.

"What… why are you blinking?" Bill blinked again.

"Wait? Did I blink?" Bill asked. Dipper nodded and Pacifica nodded also. Bill smacked himself in the forehead and groaned. "I hate having multiple eyelids! It was so much easier to wink before. How am I supposed to control one eyelid separate from the other? It's impossible!" Bill complained.

"No it's not." Dipper said before he winked. Bill glared at him.

"Oh now you're just rubbing it in." Bill commented with a glare. Pacifica was the first to broach a new subject.

"What's this about a wedding gift Bill?" she asked. Bill blinked then smirked.

"oh I have a feeling you'll enjoy what I cooked up… it's a bit risky… but I have a feeling everything will be find… it's only twenty four hours… what can happen in that time?" Bill commented with an offhand shrug. Dipper frowned.

"I'm not sure what you're planning Bill but I think you'll find a lot can happen in twenty four hours. " Dipper said worriedly. Bill batted his hand down with a smug look.

"Relax Pine tree, just meet me with Mabel and Pacifica at the UFO hatch after this is all over. You'll be happily surprised I'm sure." Bill assured. Dipper was still a bit worried but turned to Pacifica as someone tap their drinks for them to kiss.

* * *

Pacifica stood on the hill and smiled. Dipper looked at her and frowned.

"What is it?" he asked. Pacifica smiled.

"You proposed to me here." She said with a happy smile. Dipper smiled and they leaned in for a kiss. Bill appeared between them in demon form.

"Okay okay! Break it up! Yeesh you're gonna make me gag!" he cried. Pacifica chuckled.

"You're just jealous." Pacifica said smugly. Bill didn't comment. Mabel walked up the hill and looked around.

"I don't see any aliens…" she said in confusion.

"Look down." Dipper insisted. Mabel stared at the grass then looked at Dipper with a raised eyebrow. Dipper gestured to the mountains and Mabel finally got it. She stared at him in shock before she looked down at her feet.

"Wow." She said quietly. Dipper just chuckled a bit. Bill glanced behind to them before he looked off to the setting sun.

"this is going to be my most impressive feat of distorted reality I've ever done… but I think it's worth it… this is my wedding gift to you Dipper… but it's also a sort of birthday gift for you and Mabel… even though I know your birthdays aren't until next week…" Mabel and Dipper frowned a bit but glanced at the triangle. After a few seconds Bill changed. He rapidly switched through forms as he screamed gibberish. "UHAOLUXHTC! HTAED FO ETSAT RETTIB EHT ESREVER! HTAERB WARD OD DESAECED EHT OS! EFIL FO HCUOT NEDLOG THAT NRUTER! EFIRTS DLO EHT OT NRUTER YEHT DNA EKIRTS SKCOLC OWT NEHT!" suddenly before them was strange whirling portal not unlike the one StanFord had built. The trio stood there the seas spray wiping into their face. Suddenly out of the strange portal a fist wearing brass knuckles pounded into Bills face. He went flying back.

"ACK! BILL!" Pacifica cried as she rushed to his side. Dipper grabbed the assailant held his arm behind his back. As he did he heard a humming noise from behind him before the rushing sound of the portal closing. Dipper felt the tip of a gun on the back of his head.

"Oh… oh no…" Bill moaned from the grassy hilltop. Pacifica was trying t get him up.

"Come on Bill."

"My nose... oh my nose, it's broken for sure… he broke my nose." Bill groaned. Pacifica scoffed.

"You don't have a nose Bill! You're a triangle!" Pacifica cried.

"Well I'm sure it'll be broken when I revert back to human form!" Bill argued.

"Your human for is an illusion you put on in front of people! You explained it to me months ago!" Pacifica cried in annoyance. She stood and looked at Dipper before he mouth dropped open and her eyes widened. Mabel was in the exact same position. Dipper still hadn't moved. He was frozen holding who ever this was' arm behind his back. After a few seconds the man grunted.

"Ford hurry up and shoot the kid will ya! Before he breaks my arm!" he growled.

"Quiet Stanley!"

"Don't you quiet Stanley me!" the man yelled back. Dipper released the man in shock. Quick as lightning the man whipped around and tried to punch Dipper out. Dipper caught the man's fist in his own and stared at his face in shock.

"… G… Grunkle Stan?" Dipper asked in shock. Stan's eyes widened in shock.

"Dipper?" the gun at Dipper's head clicked.

"Don't listen to it Stanley. It's Bill pulling a trick on us. He must want something. I don't know how he escaped but he wouldn't do this unless he thought he had something to gain.

"Oh Sixer!" Bill said appearing at Ford shoulder. "You always did assume the worst of me." He said draping an arm over Ford shoulder. "You want proof, asked something only Dipper would know. I can't know everything about good old pine tree…" Bill said as he drifted away. Ford looked between the triangle and the man who was still staring at Stan. After a few seconds he cleared his throat.

"What are words to work by, but not to live?" Ford asked in the riddled form he had taught him.

"Trust no one." Dipper replied. Ford dropped lowered his gun in shock.

"My god… it's really you?" Ford asked. Mabel answered for Dipper by running and giving him a hug. She sobbed heavily into his sea soaked coat. Meanwhile Dipper was doing the very same with Stanley. After a while Dipper held him at arm's length and let his arms fall. Stanley looked over at Pacifica and frowned.

"What's Northwest doing here? Last in knew you two hated each other?" Stan said. Pacifica smiled.

"It's Pacifica Pines now." She said. Both Ford and Stan stared at her before they looked at Dipper. Dipper smiled.

"You're our wedding gift from Bill." The pair looked around but Bill was nowhere to be found. Pacifica looked a bit worried.

"I'll go look for him." she said before she ran off into the direction of the town. Ford rushed to follow her but Dipper stopped him.

"It's fine… Bill isn't the same anymore… Pacifica has actually been living with him for almost a year now…" Stan and Ford stared at him like he was crazy. Dipper sighed. "It's a bit of a long story." The pair looked at him expectantly. "which I apparently have to tell… it started about a year after you left… the phone call came late in the night… dinner had been eaten, pigs had been fed, pajamas had been put on… it was the worst time really…"

* * *

"And… well… that's the end… Pacifica and I have spent the last few months planning our wedding… honestly it's been pretty slow compared to what I was used to for the past twenty years…" Dipper finished after an hours of explaining what happened in the last twenty years that the Stan twins had been gone. Ford and Stan were sitting at the mystery shack as if no time had passed. There was silence before Stan finally slammed his fist on the table.

"Oh for! Dammit I'm gonna be the impulsive one and ask! What were you think you idiot!" Stan cried as he stood and smack Dipper on the back of the head. "Didn't you learn anything from us? The next time somebody dies if you don't stick by Mabel I'm gonna ask that triangle monster to make me haunt you got it!" Stan threatened angrily. Dipper chuckled and nodded.

"I was waiting for that… you always scolded me for doing stupid stuff like that in high school… I spent all of my later teen years with your voice in my head berating me for dropping out."

"YOU DROPPED OUT?!" both Ford and Stan cried in indignation. Dipper smacked himself in the forehead for being such an idiot.

* * *

Ford groaned as he slumped into the couch on the back porch. Stan slouched beside him. The both looked at the Pines around them and sighed.

"Feels strange… knowing that in our timeline I'll never see this place again." Ford said quietly. Stan sighed.

"I apologize in advance for not being there to keep you out of trouble… though I have a feeling you went looking for it you nerdy idiot." Stan said punching Ford in the shoulder. Ford growled.

"Oh I'm sure I had to save you as many time you impulsive moron!" Ford argued. The two growled before Mabel chuckled from the doorway. They both looked at her. She stood in front of them.

"Just like always… you two always fought…" she murmured. Settled down on the couch between the two and stared up at the pines. "All through high school I surrounded myself with hundreds of people… I was so concern with being popular and having lots of friend that I left my first ever friend behind… and when there was no one left… I expected him to be waiting for me… but he wasn't." Mabel said looking out into the pines. "You shouldn't be mad at Dipper for what he did… we were both at fault… Dipper shouldn't have left its true… but I should have been his sister… we really did end up just like you two…" with that Mabel stood again and smiled at her beloved Grunkles. "I missed you… both of you… so much…" with that Mabel slipped back into the house. Ford and Stan looked at each other before they looked back out into the pine trees.

"You raised them pretty good Stanley." Ford commented as the sun started to set.

"Naw… their just good kids." Sat insisted. Ford smiled.

"You could be right about that." He said quietly. As darkness fell they went back into the Mystery Shack. Wherein Dipper and Mabel were trying to explain the situation to Soos before he had a heart attack.

* * *

Around ten in the morning Stan rose and made his way down stairs. Dipper was sitting at the kitchen table drink coffee reading the newspaper. Stan smiled a bi before he sat beside Dipper. Soon Pacifica walked in and placed a sleepy kiss on Dippers cheek. Ford was next to walk in. he poured himself a coffee before he asked for the paper. Stan found it strange that the room wasn't rocking, so used to having breakfast on the boat. Ford looked up from a paper a few times in confusion surely checking the same thing. As they were sitting there a domestic silence slipped over them. Mabel was the last to walk in and sit down at the kitchen table. She still looked a bit tired and she drank her glass of orange juice. There was more silence and Stan felt his eyes drop a bit as was prone in the early hours in the more.

"HEY SCIMITAR!" Bill screamed appearing in the center of the table. Stan jumped a mile, Ford fell out of his chair, and Mabel flung her juice across the table which jarred Pacifica out of her own tired stupor. Dipper was the only one unaffected though he did look decidedly cross. Stan was clutching his chest gasping for breath.

"Holy hot chocolate." he gasped. Bill was cackling like the mad man he was.

"You guys are the funniest humans ever you know that?" bill commented with laughter still in his voice. Dipper glared at Bill.

"What do you want that can't wait until later Bill?" he asked angrily. Bill floated silently for a few seconds before he sighed.

"They can't stay pine tree… you know that… it'd mess with the time line…" Bill said. Dipper frowned before he sighed.

"How long?" Dipper asked. Bill was silent again.

"About two hours… you slept in… say your goodbyes…" Bill insisted before he disappeared. The family looked across the table at each other thinking of the inevitable that would arrive just minutes from now.

* * *

Bill was waiting on the hill. Ford and Stan were talking with Pacifica who was laughing at their banter. Behind the trio Mabel and Dipper were dragging their feet. Suddenly from behind them Oakley came rushing out of the bushes.

"Mabel!" he cried. Mabel smiled and ran to give Oakley a hug and kiss on the cheek. Oakley looked up at the Stan twins in shock before he shook his head.

"You know what… I think I'm getting used to it, weird stuff just happens to you to you two."

"Who's the tall guy?" Stan asked with a slight glare.

"Oakley Corduroy, Wendy's younger brother, Mabel's boyfriend." Dipper responded.

"WHAT?!" both Stans cried in anger. Dipper blinked and winced in Mabel's behalf as they both marched down the hill to the pair. Pacifica shot a glare at Dipper who looked sheepish. From their spot on their hill the watch Oakley slowly pale as Ford flashed his gun and Stan showed off his brass knuckles. Meanwhile Mabel had puffed up and was glaring at them. After they were done the pair marched back up the hill.

"Did you see how he paled like that? I don't think he's got the strength for her." Stan grumbled.

"Humph, you might just be right." Ford complained. After they walked passed Dipper turned back. Mabel was standing in front of him. She punched him in the arm.

"You jerk." She muttered darkly. Dipper winced apologetically but the four of them, as the, though terrified, red haired man was still following them. Once they reached the top. They could see a bit of a scene. B ill was shaking hands with both Stans in human form. He looked up to Dipper and looked at him sadly. Dipper walked up to each of his uncles as Bill chanted his unusual phrase and opened the portal back up. Dipper was still in Stan's hug when he heard a whisper.

"Hey kid… I'm proud of you." Stan murmured. Dipper blinked in shock. When Stan released his hold he gave no indication that anything had transpired. "So hey before I go, is my tombstone bigger then Poindexter's?"

"WHAT?!" Ford cried out in anger. Dipper gulped.

"Erm… well…"

"Yes?" Stan asked with an angry face.

"It is." Mabel said "sort of." Dipper shot her a thankful look. She returned fire with a glance that clearly said 'you owe me'

"Sort of? What's that mean?"

"It's wider. And has more writing on it."

"HAHA BOOM!" Stan shouted at Ford.

"Can it Stanley!" Ford shouted back. Bill flew into Ford and shoved him in.

"All right come on!" he said dragging Stan over.

"I'll never forget this day." Stan said with a sigh.

"Oh! Now would be a good time to tell you that you won't be retaining any memories of today OKAY BYE!" Bill said as Stan turned to him in shock.

"Wait what!" Stan cried. All too soon the portal closed. Dipper, Mabel, Pacifica, Oakley and Bill all stood on the hill. After a few minutes of silence Pacifica smiled before she turned to Dipper.

"We have a honeymoon to get to." She said. Dipper was silent before he sighed and smiled, turning to Mabel and Oakley. They were standing beside one another.

"Go have fun! Just don't forget us okay!" Mabel said with a smirk. Dipper walked over and gave Mabel a hug. He shook Oakley hand with a smile before he turned to Bill. He offered his hand. Bill smirked before he took his hand. There was no bargain, not trade off, simply a handshake between friends. With that Dipper and Pacifica made their way back into town. Bill stood on the hill with Mabel and Oakley.

"I know you're thinking it… all you people reading this…" Bill muttered looking into the sky. Mabel frowned at him.

"Who are you talking to?" she asked. Bill smiled.

"It's not done yet… not just yet…" Bill insisted. Mabel rolled her eyes.

"You're crazy…" she said with an indulgent tone.

"Sure I am. Your point?" Bill asked. Mabel just sighed.

"Come on, it's almost lunch." She said. Oakley nodded and the pair made their way off the hill. Bill stood there for a while before he made his way down. Just as he entered the forest a flock of red song birds flew across the clearing.

* * *

Bill was watching the couples as they danced. He glanced at the photo on the bar shelf and smiled. All around him people were talking. It was a familiar scene. Suddenly four familiar faces were before him. Bill smiled at them.

"CEASAR!" Mabel cried with a smile. Bill laughed.

"What do you want shooting star?"

"Pacifica reminded me of something! You never achieved your new year's resolution!" Bill paled.

"What? Heh heh! What are you talking about?! I didn't hear anything about a revolution!"

"Nice try Ceasar. Pacifica told me all about it." Dipper said with a laugh, Oakley laughed to.

"Yeah, Mabel said there was an embarrassing secret involved." Bill glared at the tall red head, dreaming of filling his life with terror.

"Come on Ceasar! It's just a secret." Pacifica said with a smile. Bill groaned then he smirked.

"But you didn't complete yours either! So you have to tell a secret too!" Pacifica paled. Mabel laughed.

"Alright… how bout this. We'll each reveal an embarrassing secret to the group. I'll go first… I still can't crochet…I'm great at knitting but I just can't figure out the looping and hooking…" Mabel said with a blush. Oakley cleared his throat and scratched his neck.

"I hate flannel." Everyone gapped at him. "I know I know… I just never had the self confidence to tell me family." Oakley admitted. Pacifica heaved a heavy sigh.

"I have a second middle name." Pacifica said quietly. Everyone waited expectantly. "Haggie-Anne" Mabel, Dipper, Bill and Oakley all snorted before bursting into laughter. Pacifica glared that them all. Everyone turned to Bill. The demon stared at them for a few seconds before he chuckled.

'Heh heh… I should have discouraged these relationships… you're all ganging up on me." The glared harder. Bill sweat a bit as their glares got harder and harder until finally. "ALRIGHT! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED MABEL TO KNIT ME A SWEATER BUT I'VE NEVER HAD THE COURAGE TO ASK AND I FEEL LIKE IT WOULD BE TOO WEIRD!" Bill shouted. The bar was quiet for a bit before people went back to dancing unfazed. Mabel was smiling at Bill and pulled a bright yellow sweater out of her bag. she pulled it on over bill's head and he looked down. On the collar a bow tie had been knitted into the pattern. "Wait…"

"I had it made this whole time you silly shape. You just had to ask." Mabel said. Bill smiled at her.

"Thanks…" Bill said. The he smirked and turned to Dipper. Everyone else in turned to him expectantly. Dipper looked at them and sighed.

"I suppose it's my turn hmm…"

"Of course. It's called a pact for a reason." Mabel said with a roll of her eyes.

"Come on, it can't be that bad." Oakley cried.

"Come on Dipper." Pacific said with a smile.

"Yeah pine tree! It's just one secret." Bill said with a dark chuckle. Both Dipper and Pacifica shot Bill a warning look before Dipper took a deep breath.

"Alright…" Dipper said with a heavy sigh.

 _"My real name is…"_

* * *

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* * *

A/N: I'm the worlds biggest troll…

And I really don't care…

Feel free to message me for the answers to the ciphers… they're harder this time… I was just testing your knowledge.

Until next time


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